You know...it's not to say that my life is terrible or i'm insanely miserable. I just feel reckless. I feel a need to hold myself accountable, to think things through, to make conscious choices about what is right for me. I haven't been good about that. I've thrashed along irregardless of my heart, my soul...in the name of my heart, my soul, so desperate to find whatever it is i am looking for in life. I don't even know what that is.