Thursday, May 24, 2007
Ugly dreams, the smell of garlic
It's a little after 6 am and i'm in a motel 6 in Gilroy california. I've never been so happy to have my alarm go off after only 6 hours of sleep because i just woke from a nightmare so vivid that i feel ill and i just can't shake it. In my dream there was a man out to get me, trying to kill me. He chased me all over town as i ran from him, hid from him. He was playing mind games - leaving little clues and messing with my mind. When i evaded him he kidnapped my girls and then dan who was my husband in my screwy dream. They were sending me all over town on wild goose chases and i was frantic to get to my babies, to find dan, to save them. This man was after me, chasing me, and i hid under a bush. I was laying there, my heart pounding out of my chest, trying so hard not to make a sound, scared for my life, frantic to find my family, desperate to stay alive, and my alarm clock went off. I'm incredibly relieved to come back to reality, but it was so real that i can't get rid of it. I feel like i left life undone, like i failed.